FYAHMIX

Perhaps it is more accurate to say that she delighted in sexuality. Sex was a reason for joy and pleasure, not embarrassment, for Mary. She got very irritated by interviewers who expressed surprise that someone of her age should write so forthrightly about sex. "Well, the older you are, the more sex you have had," she would retort. That quietened them.She was a voracious reader and was particularly interested in young writers, to whom she was a great support She often phoned me to recommend writers for the festival. Many writers felt she held some secret key to instant success, but her only advice was to read a lot and get a large waste paper bin.

Many reviews perpetuated the myth of her overnight success by saying she began writing in her seventies. This provoked one of her sharp responses, "I have been writing all my life. It was only in my seventies that the books were good enough to be published."Mary's reserved, slightly distant manner belied a warm heart She enjoyed socialising, joking and gossiping. Like many writers, she also became very attached to the characters in her books and many reappear in several novels because she wanted to "meet" them again. She once said that she found herself praying for one of her characters at mass one Sunday.Mary's funeral was original, rule-breaking, eccentric - just like her. Those of us who normally wear black searched our wardrobes for something colourful.

She had said that she hated the thought of a sea of dark colours at her funeral, so we donned pink jackets, blue shirts, stripey scarves. Her bright red rectangular coffin had been made by a friend some years ago and had doubled as a coffee table in her house until it was needed It was carried in to the gentle sound of taped bird song. There was a Catholic priest and a requiem mass with all the smells and bells you would expect, but it took place at her request at the Anglican church in Totnes, appropriately called St Mary's, just minutes from her home. It was particularly poignant that it was a Friday, market day in Totnes. Mary had enjoyed Totnes market with its laid-back hippie stall holders and organic food. It had featured in her novel Second Fiddle.A couple of years ago we took Mary to the Devon County Show, where she had been asked to do a book signing. It was a bit odd to see her sitting there among prize bulls, farm machines and long horned sheep.

Lots of farmers and people in green wellies streamed by not noticing her or having any idea who she was until a woman stopped, clapped her hands to her mouth and gasped, "Is it really you? It can't be! I'm amazed you're still alive. I thought you'd be pushing up the daisies by now." I felt uneasy, but Mary much preferred this approach to deference and chuckled "I should be pushing up the daisies by now," she said Well, sadly now she is. I'll miss her at our 12th Dartington festival, but we're having a special free event to remember her (Monday 14 July, 5pm). This time she won't need to suck her homeopathic pills beforehand.This year's Ways With Words Festival at Dartington Hall in Devon runs from 11-21 July.